The presence of a lady visitor this weekend means I will have apply some heavy duty domestic engineering.
Bins Empty - check.
Heads clean enough so that the Virgin Mary would be proud to park breakfast there - check.
Battleships in the Bathroom removed - check.
Fizz on ice - check.
Lodger bribed to make herself and dog scarce - check.
Extensive collection of Indonesian Gentleman's Pictorials in loft - check.
Record collection nonchalantly yet carfeully displayed - check.
Strategic pail of water placed just so (Let me get you out of those wet clothes) - check.
Industrial floor adhesive - check.
You can picture it now:
And this my dear - is the eastern conservatory and arboretum. I'm afraid house rules insist upon nudity. You may find it quite 'liberating'.