Thursday, May 17, 2007

No, I said 'Fisk', there's no 'T' in it.

An interesting night on the wires last night. Two telephone calls which amused me a great deal. The most amusing part is that it was two young ladies who wanted a favour off me. One of which I was obliging to, the other left a sour taste in my mouth. The first conversation I relay with delight - for I can help a friend. The second is worthy of a little chappy fisking.

The first was a young lady friend (single, cute, non-target, dark haired and likes house music) who had fallen on some bad luck and needed somewhere to live. She phoned and said she was after a huge favour, and needed some help. Knowing I was a dog lover with a spare room - and she was being made homeless I was her first call. She was sweet, polite and friendly - and said that at any time if I got annoyed I could chuck her out - it was a short term favour.
Without hesitation I agreed to take her in - with her large doggy as well, until such time as she sorts herself out.

By the time she realises I live on a diet of parsnip sandwiches, minced raw chicken and laxatives it will be too late. She will then join me on the turbid pathways to Elysium via sexual extremism and 'Nude Wednesdays'.

UPDATED: Rude bit removed.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh dear, I wonder if The Scot is reading this?!

By the way, here's something you might be interested in ...
http://www.thechap.net/olympics.html

Enjoy!

Nicodemus said...

I am rather hoping that she does. She does need to see her behaviour was atrocious - and by my shaming her on the interweb, she will see the error of her ways. Unlikely though.

Ah the Olympics - I am hoping to enter this year - My favourite is the 'shouting at foreigners' contest. I may have a flutter on the three legged hrose race too.

I do subscribe to the Chap - and it is nice to see that others are discovering their ways. Being a South London gal - you will be amused by the French offering 'A Year in Catford'.

Anonymous said...

I like the look of the Hop, Skip & G&T, myself. Perhaps I shall see you there ...

Nicodemus said...

What a splendid Idea!
I shall let you know of my atire in advance - I will certainly be wearing either pith helmet, Fez, or Flying goggles.
If you desire we could arrange a picnic. A spirit burner accompanies the picnic basket - to warm the hollondaise sauce, and allow the prepartion of tea. No flasks here!

Nicodemus said...

I say - would you like me to procure a ticket for you? I fancy a crack at entering the 'Bounders' competition.

Anonymous said...

Heehee. Ok go on then. Should I wear my 20s flapper outfit? Or perhaps a '40s teadress?

Nicodemus said...

Flapper, deffo. Implies loose morals, addictive substances and the roaring 20's.
I would be seriously impressed if you had a flapper outfit. Or even a 40's tea dress.
I am thinking either Colonial Planter or Orientalist whose sould has been lost to the east and opium.

Anonymous said...

I do actually have said outfit, procured for a more-than-usually-classy hen night earlier this year. It involved a Cambridgeshire cottage, violet-scented cocktails and a murder mystery. And a thumping hangover, naturally.

Nicodemus said...

I say! Cracking lass! I fly in Cambridgeshire, dontchyerknow....